Bye Week Follies: The Magical Jake Butt

Yes I'm a tight end. Yes my last name is butt. Hhahaha
— jake butt (@JBooty_88) September 22, 2013

By this point in the season, we're all aware that Michigan has a tight end with the last name of Butt and that this fact can be used to make many easy jokes and will most assuredly lead to many amusing "unintentional" double entendres from the broadcast booth over the next four season. But this post is about the added level of merriment brought about by the fact that he's Jake Butt.

Fans of the late lamented Bender Bending Rodriguez should be pleased that John DiMaggio continues to do voice work on a show set 1000 years in the future in The Cartoon Network's Adventure Time. As Jake the Dog, he voices a character with magical shape-shifting properties. This of course means that his butt also his magical shape-shifting properties and is capable of amazing things. Behind the jump, the mystical powers of Jake Butt.

Improper use of the new Michigan logo

The U-M Global Communications Office has just released a new logo, complete with a new custom font called "The Victors," and a new set of logo guidelines. Due to space limitations, they were not able to list all the ways to misuse the logo. We list a few more in this post.

1. To protect the logo from abuse, DO NOT let the logo anywhere near the Rutgers Athletic Department.

2. DO NOT use the logo as part of a fundraising drive to purchase a video of a prominent Canadian politician smoking crack.

3. DO NOT incorporate the logo into animated GIFs involving animals owned by members of the football team.

Above all, DO NOT create presentation templates for students and faculty to use when presenting their scholarly work. The Brand cannot be tainted by association with the academic mission of the university.

On Retired Numbers

This Joe Posnanski post got me thinking about retired numbers in other sports and the categories they fit into. College is a strange case, because I think you only have three or four years to evaluate a guy's contribution. I didn't even realize that we had any retired numbers for football until a few years ago.

No.	Player
11	Francis Wistert, Albert Wistert, Alvin Wistert
47	Bennie Oosterbaan
48	Gerald Ford
87	Ron Kramer
98	Tom Harmon

Of our guys, I think Oosterbaan, Harmon, and Kramer are easy to identify under the Greatness category. Oosterbaan was a three-time All-American in a time when I don't think freshmen were allowed on the varsity squad. Kramer was a multi-sport beast whose number was retired after his senior season. Harmon was Harmon; our first Heisman winner and the #1 pick of the NFL draft. The Wisterts were collectively 9-time letter-winners and 4-time All-Americans. None probably get it on their own, so you might argue an emotional component there. I don't know where you file Gerald Ford. His number wasn't officially retired until 1994 and he was never an All-American and his number was in wide circulation until then. It's mostly a recognition for his post-Michigan achievements, which isn't its own category in Posnanski's system. In the pros, the situation rarely arises where a guy has three or four good years, then leaves the sport entirely to go to law school and later becomes a prominent politician.

We do have the interesting situation where no one who played after 1956 has a retired number, and I like it that way. I like what the #1 jersey has come to mean, the recent flap notwithstanding. I like that #7 has some meaning of its own. I want the next guy who puts on #20 to understand what he's taking over. Michigan is a team with a history that stretches back to 1879, and the numbers in circulation make it a living history. The numbers mean different things to different people (#3 is always Marlin Jackson to me), but they're all Michigan.

It's like the back half of Abbey Road...

I had no real major article this week, so I wanted to roll with two ideas which were partially formed in my head: The Michigan State/Notre Dame game this week and an appreciation of Joe Paterno. So that's what you'll get, after the jump…

1). Michigan State/Notre Dame: One Fan's Quandary

In this "Death not an option" exercise, I need to try and decide whom I should be "rooting" for this weekend in the Spartans visit to the Fightin' Irish. There are a number of things to consider in this, so let's look at them.

a). Arrogance

It is often said that Michigan fans are the most arrogant of all college football fans. This, of course, is a pure and abject lie. But, Michigan fans consider Notre Dame fans to be the most arrogant of all college football fans, so this is possibly saying something. By the same token, a not insignificant segment of Michigan State fans have a tendency to be the worst of all college football fans, the needling little brother. Michigan State fans, if they were being purely honest with themselves, are happier that Michigan started 0-2 than that they started 2-0. Notre Dame fans may be arrogant, but they would never revel in a rival's failing ahead of their own success. 1 point to the Irish.

b). Brothers in Arms

There are those who believe that you root for your conference mates during non-conference play for the sake of your conference's national perception. That said, 3-0 Michigan State beating 0-3 Notre Dame this year will not make the Big Ten look strong, but losing to Notre Dame will be another knock against the Big Ten. 1 point to the Spartans.

c). Making history

If Michigan State wins, they will have won six straight games at Notre Dame Stadium, something that no visiting team has ever done. I'm not sure I like Michigan State owning that record. So a small point, but a point, to Notre Dame.

d). We got ours

Michigan has beaten Notre Dame this year, and beaten them soundly. So I don't feel the need to see Notre Dame win to make their beating of Michigan look better in the stream. A point to Michigan State.

e). Does it really matter?

If Michigan State wins, it's another week of "what's wrong with Notre Dame" stories, which, admittedly, takes heat off Michigan. If Notre Dame wins, it's a classic Sparty being Sparty. In the end, it doesn't matter which team wins for Michigan's sake. Maybe it's the choices we do not make that count the most.

2). An appreciation of JoePa I like Joe Paterno. How can you not? Does Penn State have any rivals? I mean, sure, Pittsburgh, but why would you want to play your rivals? But their old Eastern rivalries have died and they're still treated like the new stepson of the Big Ten, sort of the Cousin Oliver when you think about it. But Penn State has Joe Paterno, and they have had Joe Paterno since the Johnson administration. And JoePa may be crusty, and old, and any other hammer you want to hit him with, but he's still the Brooklyn accented bad ass coach who played at Brown, who has more wins against schools in Division I FCS than any other coach, the only coach to win the Orange, Sugar, Cotton, Fiesta, and Rose Bowl in his career, chaser of referees, leader of pep rallies, philanthropist, holder of high academic standards, and general all around grand old man of the game. Perhaps it's easy to like a coach when your team has won eight straight over his team, but if given a choice of who I'd want as my grandpa, I'd pick JoePa over Coach Carr every time.