Smash Mouth Football

It started here...

As if we all haven't been through enough, BWW bowl announces a Smash Mouth concert as part of the pre game festivities.
— Everett Cook (@everettcook) December 20, 2013

Then this happened...

[chorus] Hey now You're mediocre Head to Tempe Go, Play Hey now You lost to Penn State Are you surprised this bowl's lame? [next verse]
— Scott Bell (@sbell021) December 20, 2013

And, well, since bad song parodies are a thing we do here...

Somebody once told me the SEC is gonna roll me
But they ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
We were looking kind of dumb with our offense in the 'gun
In the shape of an "I" it's what the Borge said

Well, the hits start coming and they don't stop coming
If you don't block, can get the ground running
Didn't make sense not to block or run
Your lizard brain isn't smart so your OC gets dumb


So much to do, beat UConn by three
Couple of bounces might have prevented some bad beats.
You'll never know if you don't go
But then Gibbons misses two off his toe


[Chorus:]
Hey now, you're mediocre
Head to Tempe, Go, Play

Hey now, you lost to Penn State
Are you surprised this bowl's lame?

It's a hot seat and they say it gets warmer
They're fired up now but wait 'til your O Line gets older
But the media men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the B1G ring picture

Safety depth is getting pretty thin
Gardner's gettin sacked, makes it tough to win
Sparty couches on fire. How about yours?
That's the way we like it as we say stuff untoward.

[Chorus 2x]

Somebody once preened should we call a bubble screen
I need to make plays in space
I said yep what a concept
Just got to execute better myself
Ignoring the calls for O-Coordinator change


Well, the hits start coming and they don't stop coming
If you don't block, can't get the ground running
Didn't make sense not to block or run
Your lizard brain isn't smart so your offense plays dumb

So much to do, beat UConn by three
Couple of bounces might have prevented some bad beats.
You'll never know if you don't go
But then Gibbons misses two off his toe

[Chorus]

And all DB wants is gold
Need a title to break the mold

It's Always Denard Time...

[Author's note: I regret nothing!]

Denard Time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Rolled out to right side of the line

Doesn't matter that the situation is third and nine.

Hands up if you're open for a first down tonight,

Cuz It's always Denard time.

Threw off my back foot like I didn't care

Lost a shoe, still couldn't tackle me anywhere

I'm in if you need a touchdown tonight

Cuz It's always Denard time

Good morning and good night

I do my best work Under the Lights

It's gonna be alright

Doesn't matter if were down by nine,

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Doesn’t matter if we're down by nine,

It's always Denard time.

Freaked out missed the open man again

Checked out of coverage and hit my tight end

Let's find you if you're open for a first down tonight

Cuz It's always Denard time

Good morning and good night

I do my best work Under the Lights

It's gonna be alright

Doesn't matter if we're down by nine

It's always Denard time.

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Doesn't matter if we're down by nine

It's always Denard time.

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Doesn't matter if we're down by nine

It's always Denard time.

Doesn't matter when

Denard just made 'em miss again.

Doesn't matter where

Denard just made 'em miss by a hair.

Doesn't matter when

Denard just made 'em miss again.

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Doesn't matter if we're down by nine,  

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh Woah-oh-oh-oh

It's always Denard time

Woah-oh-oh-oh

Doesn't matter if we're down by nine, 

It's always Denard time.

Michigan vs. Michigan State: Remedial Chaos Theory

Ever wonder why they called it "Greendale" and not "Maizedale"?

INT. DANNY PUDI AND DONALD GLOVER'S APARTMENT, GREENDALE, CO (TIMELINE 2: WHEREIN I WISH IT WERE SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT)

The PIZZA GUY rings the buzzer. EVERYONE touches their noses simultaneously.

JOEL MCHALE

Ugh. OK, staring on my left with one, your number comes up, you go.

DANNY PUDI

Just so you know, Joel, you are now creating six different timelines.

JOEL MCHALE

Of course I am, Danny.

The DIE lands with the number TWO facing up.