HOCKEYBEAR's Guide to Campus Destruction III: University of Virginia

The best place to find someone for your college or university's Board of Regents is the Milford Academy of Newport Beach, California. Regents should be neither seen nor heard, not even by someone with the super-terrestrial visual and auditory capabilities of HOCKEYBEAR. The only way that good regents can be detected is by the steady stream of sizable alumni donations and the steady inability of the state to pass legislation cutting higher education funding.

Unfortunately, for many state schools, regents are chosen by election or by gubernatorial appointment, and a human does not get elected or appointed by being neither seen nor heard. (HOCKEYBEAR could identify some humans whose chances of getting elected would improve if they were neither seen nor heard if he had much interest in non-galactic politics.) These humans realize that their position as regent gives them power and yet do not realize that with great power comes with great responsibility. They could use radioactive spider bites.

In Summer 2012, HOCKEYBEAR was enraged to see the Board of Visitors of the University of Virginia abuse their authority and interfere with the academic leadership. While previous episodes of my Guide to Campus Destruction have involved fiery explosions, this week HOCKEYBEAR will destroy with subtlety, deviousness, and minimal property damage. The University of Virginia will receive my vengeance, served very, very cold!