(Note: This is like trying to remember a fever dream, so I may make some mistakes. Apologies in advance.)
The show starts with a video of a cyclone picking up the Big House. Then it picks up the Notre Dame Leprechaun. Then it picks up Purdue's "World's Largest Drum." Then it picks up a green block S, in front of said block S is a flaming couch. Then it picks up an angry picture of Joe Paterno, and over the PA, you can hear "COME TO PENN STATE!" from the Big Ten Network ad.
So the Big House lands on "The Wicked Witch of the South", whose socks are scarlet and grey. The Witch has stolen Denard Robinson's shoes, so our hero, Dorothy Hail has to get them back to Ann Arbor for the second half. She then gets a visit from Mary Sue (President Coleman), the Good Witch of the North, who tells her she needs to go see the Wizard who lives in the Sapphire City at the end of the Maize Brick Road. Dorothy is also met by some munchkins, whom she notes remind her of her "Little Brothers in East Lansing."
So Dorothy sets out down the Maize Brick Road where she meets a scarecrow who does have a brain, having to stand out in fields in horrible places like Indiana, Illinois, and Nebraska. Then they meet a Tin Man who doesn't have a heart, because it broke after he at so many bratwursts and cheese from his work in Wisconsin. Dorothy agrees to bring him along, because at worst, when they get back to Ann Arbor, she can turn him in for the ten cent deposit. Then they meet up with the Cowardly Nittany Lion, who lacks courage.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, one of the minions of the Wicked Witch of the East, Brutus Buckeye attacks our merry band, but they are rescued by Rufus, the Ohio Bobcat, who tackles Brutus and chases him off the Maize Brick Road. Then the Wicked Witch of the East attacks and uses her powers to make the Michigan Marching Band spell out Script Ohio. Dorothy has no fear though, as she reminds the witch that Michigan was the first marching band to spell out Script Ohio as a MMB sousaphone knocks the Witch out and O-H-I-O becomes O-H-N-O.
Eventually they reach the Sapphire City where the Wizard turns out to be Michigan drum major David Hines Jr. who tells Dorothy she had the power to go home all along by just putting on Denard's shoes (leave the laces untied) click her heels together and say "There's no place like The Big House."
And as crazy as this reads, it's about a million times crazier when you actually see it. If you have video, please let us know.
MMB, full marks.