As some of you may know, the blog Ladies... began their long-awaited Hot Bloggers Bracket today. One of the many entries is yours truly, CDB. Why? Because the Ladies... are a group of Deadspin commenters who I have come to know over the last year and who are consistently hilarious, so in the name of good fun, I entered. I earned a 19 seed in the NL West. Out of 22. I'm not going to lie, that stings a little. I know I'm not the best looking guy, but remember, this is about hotness, and hotness can include things like wit, charm, guile, and the ability to string together several humorous sentences in a row. Nevertheless, my competition, HG from You've Been Blinded is currently stomping me like a narc at a biker rally. He's wearing eye black, how can I possibly compete with that?
(P.S.: I do not know HG and in reading his site today, he's a rather talented blogger with keen insights and well written pieces. We will not mind losing to him if it comes to that. This is not about him, however.)
And then it struck me.
Michigan has more living alumni than any University in the United States. What if I make this not about defending my honor, but the honor of our beloved University? What if I told you that I am the ONLY Wolverine blogger in the region, would that change your mind? What if it weren't me you were voting for, but all of the Michigan bloggers out there? All of the Wolverines?
(Of course it's worth noting that Caesar himself, Brian from MGoBlog, is the #9 seed in the Campbell Conference and really, if anyone deserves Michigan fans love, it's clearly him, but just play along. Oh and vote for him. Someone has to defend our honor, and he's at least a single digit seed.)
And what's worse, we suspect that part of our low seeding may have come from the fact that we openly questioned the SEC's Supremacy Complex (I had to submit a piece of writing from HSR and chose "Quag-Meyer", my effort to explain why Urban Meyer is a whiny bitch). Are we really going to stand idly by and allow the SEC and its apologists to continue to hold over our heads that they are the only true conference? No, we must rise up and defend our sacred honor, the right of good Midwestern people to watch some of the best college football in the country week in and week out! A vote for me is a vote against all of the MSM tyranny that tells us that the Big Ten isn't good enough when we know better!
A vote for me is a vote for the sacred and holy traditions of Michigan athletics. The winged helmet, the chants at Yost, pinch hit home runs to win NCAA Baseball Regionals! Of the Victors, and the MMB, of Bo, and of the
the poorly lit morgue that is Crisler Arena, (wait, scratch that last one...) A vote for me is a vote for everything you love about Ann Arbor on an autumn Saturday, of as it was, and again it shall be. A vote for me is a vote for the memory of three Heisman Trophy winners, for Bullwinkle antlers, and for Ty Law knocking the ball down in 1994! This is who we are, and what we should be about.
We are proud, we are strong, we are Michigan, and we must rise up to defend that which we hold most dear by voting for the only true Wolverine (that we know of) in the region, CDB. Let us make sure that we truly are the Champions of the (NL) West!
Ladies and gentlemen thank you for your time.
(Paid for by the committee to get CDB at least a respectable margin of defeat in the bracket.)