| Bryce understands the assignment (Rachel Leggett) |
My fifty-mission capI worked it inI worked it in to look like thatIt's my fifty-mission cap(It's his fifty-mission cap)And I worked it inI worked it inAnd I worked it in to look like thatAnd I worked it in to look like that
--"Fifty Mission Cap" by The Tragically Hip, the second single from the band's 1993 album Fully Completely
"Fifty Mission Cap" is primarily the relaying of a story about Bill Barilko's 1951 Stanley Cup-winning goal and his subsequent disappearance after a plane crash in a remote part of northern Ontario. But, as this excellent blog post explains, it's actually about appearances, and about seeming to be something rather than actually being. Which brings us to last night's game.
It has become clearer to me that there are two types of rivalries in college football: The ones where you want your team to beat the opponent and revel in it when it happens, and the ones where you are merely relieved that your team did not lose to the opponent, and even that relief is often cold comfort.
Michigan presents a stark vision of this. Ohio State has been so good for so long, the stakes frequently so high when the teams meet, that victory seems like the only acceptable outcome, but a loss, while frustrating, is understandable. Certainly, the last four years have helped reestablish this rivalry's essence, which had gone cold for nigh on a decade. But the Michigan State rivalry is the lowest-floor, lowest-ceiling rivalry. Yes, Michigan players love parading Paul around in his maize pants and custom-made hat, and now the Buffs, after a win, are bowl-eligible before October is over. Still, for fans, it was either "win the game you were supposed to as a two-touchdown favorite" or "hear about this crap for a year, and probably longer." Why am I so sure of that? Because that is how the history of this rivalry works. I am mostly just grateful that there was no weird kerfuffle or dustup after the game, that the strangest part of the endgame was Bryce doing selfies with fans or passing out Hot Hands, which is like a 0.25 out of 10 on the outrage scale.
As for the game itself, it went from cruise control in the first quarter, to squeaky bum time in the second, to asserting control in the third, to being grateful for Michigan State's decision-making in the fourth (and 12 penalties for 105 yards). Jimmy Rolder had a game so solid, I'm willing to dub it "The Jimmy Rolder Game." 10 solo tackles, one sack, three tackles for loss, and a recovered fumble, plus an absolute cruise missile of a TFL on a fourth down when the Spartans tried to tempo Michigan subbing, and he shot the gap and pretty much ended Michigan State's last gasp.
In the end, Michigan had its highest rushing output against Michigan State since the 1994 meeting, with Haynes going for 152 and a pair of touchdowns, complemented by Marshall's 110 and a TD, which is a reminder of Tyrone Wheatley's 153 and two TDs and Tshimanga Biakabatuka's 141 and a touchdown in the 1994 game mentioned above. Michigan won a game on the road where Bryce Underwood passed for fewer yards than Davis Warren did in last year's edition of this game! Michigan won, Paul stays in Ann Arbor, and everyone can move on with their lives. Hail.
- 31-20 IS NOT a Scorigami! (Two previous occurrences, 1969 Purdue and 2018 Indiana (the snow angels game.)) (In case you were wondering, 31-13 is also NOT a Scorigami)
- 75,085 were in attendance for the game.
- Win 1,018.
- Michigan moves to 75-38-3 all-time against Michigan State University (including games when they were still State Agricultural College, Michigan Agricultural College, Michigan State College of Agriculture and Applied Science, Michigan State University of Agriculture and Applied Science, and finally Michigan State University), including four straight wins in the series for the first time since the 2002-2007 run of six straight wins.
- Michigan moves to 17-4-0 all-time on October 25, the feast of St. Crispin. (Like last week, it is Michigan's first win on this date since 2003! Michigan evens its record against Michigan State to 2-2 on St. Crispin's Day —(we few, we happy few).
- Michigan improves to 46-4-0 when scoring exactly 31 points.
- Michigan moves to 25-21-1 all-time when allowing 20 points to the opposition.
- Michigan has won 22 games all-time by precisely 11 points, the most recent example being the aforementioned Snow Angels game against Indiana in 2018.

